getting back into the lifestyle

wanting to get back into the lifestyle

while away for work

1 year ago. November 22, 2022 at 6:33 AM

I am a Tow Boater, which means I live on a boat for 28 days and home 14 days, with this being said the sexual tension and frustration my wife and I have are out of this world. we try and have as much sex as we can in the 14 days that I am home but with us having a 19-month-old it is hard to sometimes make the time to make love to each other, this sometimes causes us to have little fights here, and there but nothing major. I am writing this to ask what are some ways throughout the day that we can show each other some sexual att. I will send her flirty text and pics but I also want to throw in some kink play during the day but not sure what, we do all this talking of kink play while I am on the boat but when I get home the talk goes out the window and as does the play, how do I get it to where the play is there when I get home, she has told me many times to just take her and have my way with her but I don't want to scare her for me being the very dominate person I am. we have been together for 5 years and married for 3 years and she hasn't seen me complete DOM due to me not wanting to freak her out. I want to go full-blown DOM and show her that side of me but how do I trust that she won't leave? feedback is wanted so plz leave a comment with your thoughts.

Yours Truly,

Sir Gimli

TreasureMe(sub female){Sanguine} - I think I just need some clarification. What do you mean when your say "I want to go full blown Dom on her but how do I trust that she won't leave?"

Do you just not trust your wife in general? Where will she go? Leave the relationship? Leave you emotionally? I guess I'm just confused on your meaning.

But with the bit of info you've provided, I think going "full blown Dom" wouldn't be wise. Slow and steady is always what will win the race. I would suggest planning a scene with her full consent. Find out specifics she's interested in and begin with a kink or two at a time, then over time, as she and you grow more comfortable, add more. Set safe words. Clear boundaries. You just have to make sure you're in control of yourself enough to not just jump her bones but draw it out so you make it amazing for her.

Have fun and I hope to see more blogs with updates 🥰🥰

1 year ago

Miss Anima(dom female) - Very "dominate " but dont too scare her
So neither one know there is such a thing as safe words..

1 year ago

DarkestDesires(sub female) - You have been together 5 years and she still isn't aware you have these types of desires? My question is why hasn't it been talked about before? Why are you so scared she will leave?

1 year ago

SoaringFree(sub female) - Baby steps. Advance your flirty texts then follow through with that when you're home. Just be patient and go slow. See how she reacts to your texts first.

1 year ago

ButterfliesAndCuffs(sub female) - To put it simply, talk to her. Tell her the things you want to do to her and find out if she wants those things too. Go through what she knows she likes, what she wants to try, and what she has no interest in. Then you’ll have a basic framework to play with.
She’s probably pretty confused as to why you’ve been all talk and no action even though she’s told you multiple times she wants this.

1 year ago

LongerJohnny(dom male) - Unsurprisingly, there are some very common themes in the previous comments - maintain constant and clear communication, get full consent, make sure everyone has and knows each other's safewords. As always, begin there.

I don't have anything new to add, but in case it is helpful to get a Dom perspective: you and your wife talk a lot about kink so it is not as if either of you is unaware of what you are both interested in. You are afraid to turn it up to 100, while your wife wants... something more than 0. There is a lot between All and Nothing so like many others here I suggest starting slow and small, with a few of the softer, lighter things you talk about. If you both like it, next time add another one, and so on.

Since you mention only doing these things when you "get home" your questions seem to be largely regarding physical/sexual domination as opposed to non-sexual D/s. I mention this because rarely are any 2 people in constant physical contact, and D/s does not necessarily require physical interaction. Even over time and long distance many non-sexual things may have a favorable impact on a couple's sex life, and possibly their relationship in general, when those people are again in physical contact.

That is also a form of domination to consider adding to your conversation since it can be very emotional, sensual, and sexual.

1 year ago

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Back in time

Sir Gim​(dom male)

getting back into the lifestyle

while away for work

Sir Gim(dom male)