Just for laughs and giggles

SirsBabyDoll​(sub female)​{Pizza+☕} - It is MY opinion, that Brats are created from childhood abuse. It's not something you "choose". If you happen to like pain as pleasure, that is a SAM, Smart Assed Masochist.

Pssst, Brats always calm down and are deeply submissive once trust is built.

TreasureMe​(switch female)​{InLove} - I know the question was for the Doms, but regarding what you are, as you said, only you can decide and truly determine that. Ive personally been called a brat many times and don't consider myself one. I feel like brats have too much of a negative connotation to them since they're typically known for disobedience for attention. Im way too obedient for that and only to the Dom I've given my submission to. I know that my sassy, witty, playfulness can come across as bratty to those who want instant submission or who expect for me to behave a certain because I'm a submissive. But that just shows that we're all individuals who are complex and multifaceted. Nobody can tell you who you are, so don't let anyone's expectations of you define you. You sound like you're on just the right track girl. Kudos! 👏

GiannaRay​(sub female) - Thank you.

Sir Don​(dom male) - If I understand your questions. IMHO
A dynamic between a D/s is just that between the two of you. It would be inappropriate for me to say what you are or want to be. The Dom will need to earn your trust and submission and if your personalities mesh then it would depend on what he thinks is best for you. The dynamic is a connection and what I look for is different from most other Doms. Some Doms like being a brat tamer while others will turn and walk away from a brat. Bottom line it is the dance between the two of you. ( last comment from Grey Eyes)

GiannaRay​(sub female) - So I guess I’m not too far off base—that it will really depend on me and him and how well we fit each other. Thanks for your input.

Dominus eius​(dom male)​{LittleLott} - Hmmm - I suppose it comes down to intent. If you’re making a deliberate choice to act like that in order to provoke (or test for) a reaction from your Dom - then I would say that is being bratty. If it’s your nature and showing through. I would feel different. However, that is probably in the eye of the Dom and many would just decide to label it Bratty either way.

My sub has character - has an element of Sass. I wouldn’t want to lose that from her - as it’s part of who she is. However, teaching her there’s a line between that and disrespect - that we work on. It’s an interesting balance and strange how the level of sass grows after she’s had an orgasm. I don’t know if she’ll read this comment - I wonder if she’s worked out yet that there is a way for me to fix that.......

GiannaRay​(sub female) - When I do it during more casual things it’s a playful type of thing. It’s a way I joke around. Maybe poke the bear a little. Like a person flirts maybe? Not to specifically “test” the dom. I haven’t done it during play. I have a different mind set then. Thank you.

Dominus eius​(dom male)​{LittleLott} - You’re welcome - as always, it is (and only ever can be) just my opinion.

Master13​(dom male)​{MajesticLy} - I 100% agree that you be who you are - and honestly if a Dom likes you then you can start from there.
I truly believe that becoming friends first and communication high will determine the dynamic.

With communication come a level of understanding between both as what they want or want to try and experience.

Most likely did not answer your question - Sorry

For me - I like a sub that can be open and honest - bratty, sassy, or how ever she is. Yes this includes letting her emotions show if she needs too.
Communication is key.

I do require submission in the bedroom but that would be after all has been discussed and agreed.


So in a nut shell I agree as well that you are on the right track - just dont change you for anyone and have fun - life is to short.

GiannaRay​(sub female) - Thank you my friend. You know I value your opinion 💜.

Master13​(dom male)​{MajesticLy} - Wish you all the luck on your journey 🌹🌹

TheWhorelock​(dom male) - Sassy and being a Brat(tm) are two totally different things. Being sassy in the beginning of a relationships as mechanism of determining trust, to me, just shows you have a desire to feel you can surrender more deeply because your Dom can handle a little sass.

The difference between being Bratty and being sassy is that sassy is an attitude, and can imply all kinds of things. At its core, being a “Brat” in the kinky role sense is about intentionally doing something to playfully evoke funishment from your Dom. This can be a fun dynamic, and encourages a “conquest” style of connection. The key is that a good Brat dynamic is always consensual, at least in the background, and here’s why: if you are making your Dom funish you for misbehaving, guess what? You’re in control. If he *must* respond in a particular way then you’re topping that moment.

That doesn’t make it wrong or bad if, again, it’s consensual. People take issue with bratty people because many people hide behind the fantasy of being a brat to hide from actually surrendering control or submitting, and if done non-consensually it could be seen as a form of non-consensual humiliation play, which is super not fun for anyone.

Generally speaking I don’t like brats. If a woman says she’s a brat in her profile I generally just pass. That said, I *love* a sassy woman. I think sass is the spice of many a relationship and I love it! A good example I had of a sassy semi bratty partner that worked for me was she was very snarky and would say all kinds of hilarious mean things when I told her to get my water... but she still got up and brought me my water without any actual fuss.

TLDR: Sassy and Bratty aren’t quite the same, and the importance is in what you actually *do*, not just the attitude. To me you sound like a woman who obeys once she feels it’s earned, and to me that’s lovely and normal for a sub 🙏🏻😇

GiannaRay​(sub female) - Thank you for your detailed input. And yes I’m finding my “attitude” is very different once trust is truly earned. And I’m finding it’s natural then.

Max Heathen​(other male) - I agree with most the dom's above. Everybody views things their own way.
TO ME: Bratty is childish "spoiled brat" nature. Being sassy is completely different in the that sass is usually a verbal or body language thing with intent to make a statement in some form. Usually harmless unless you're sassing a emo who takes everything personal. Bratting, seems self severing despite the intention and in some cases will harm the relationship far more than improve it because it becomes a battle of wills wherein most the brats I've known, don't understand that they are pushing too far and when shit hits the fan, they blame it on their target's "over reaction." Which is why I avoid most brats...
The concept of "Earning one's submission" has always seemed confusing to me. From my viewpoint it is like saying: I deserve all that your dominance supplies while I make you chase for the right combo of word(s)/Action(s) for an unknown amount of time whether it be hours, days, weeks, months, or even years, while I expect you to give me the amount of dominance I want, immediately and more so, upon "earned submission"... What makes the earned submission Earned? Trust? Deeds? Words that can only be proven after face to face and long term contact? So how long am I suppose to wait to see if you are even right for me? What happens if what I earned wasn't what I was working for? How much time did I just waste on somebody who was hiding who they are, while wanting the fullness of me? So when it comes right down to it: You either submit/dom from the heart wherein you reveal who you are minute by minute, day by day or you keep lying to each other until the day comes that you "reveal" and find out whether you two match or not. Remember that this is just my opinion and opinions are like assholes... everybody has one and most are usually full of shit lol

GiannaRay​(sub female) - I can understand not going indefinitely “trying” to earn someone’s submission. That’s completely understandable.
So in your case, would you expect a sub to call you whatever title you choose to be called (daddy, sir, master etc) and start obeying things you tell her to do almost immediately, while you’re still getting to know each other. And when I say almost immediately I mean the first day or two, or even say a week?

Max Heathen​(other male) - To a degree yes. Usually in my very first contact I state: Please don't call me Master or Sir. My name is Max and you are not my slave yet. This is a subtle test. If one can not even submit to simply respecting my request to calling me Max, how can I expect them to ever be the slave I want? Do I expect them to kneel at my feet, fetch me my ale and be a belly dancing, stripper whore immediately... lmao nope. I'm not for insta-dom in that degree.

GiannaRay​(sub female) - When I talk of my submission being earned I guess I should have been more specific. There are some that want it pretty much right off the bat. So I wasn’t sure what time frame you were referring to. Thank you for your feedback!

Lion​(dom male)​{Hazel Eyes} - I will say that your submission should be based on your trust of the dom you choose. My lioness is Greek, has an attitude and can be very bratty outside the bedroom. Read my past blog on shaving cream, she's down right despicable when it comes to playing jokes on me. But this is why I love her, now it's totally different when talking about her submission to me that attitude would not be welcome in those situations. Best advice, be yourself, have lots of conversations about everything when choosing a person to spend your time with. Anyone not willing to take the time to know all about you in every aspect may not be worth your submission. Best wishes for you. 🦁

GiannaRay​(sub female) - Thank you

OraclePollon​(sub female)​{NotYours} - whatever it is, just never let someone call you it out of disdain. If they are doing it with adoration, then let them call you whatever they/you want. My Sir is a sarcastic ass... I am also a sarcastic ass, but we are both fully aware that anytime he wants to flip that switch, we both know the words that change the mood.

Welcome, and nice to meet you!

GiannaRay​(sub female) - Thank you! 🥰