So i read a blog this Am that got me thinking. It had a good point. Anyone here knows how I feel about collars which is why I submitted the way I did in my blog. Anyway.....
Subs it is also our responsibility to be true to our collar. If someone messages you then kindly inform them you are taken and end the conversation. We do not have to answer back. I answer to only one and if the messages continue then there is a block option. We also shouldn't be reaching out to others if we are considering a Dom, and yes I am guilty of this. Now the exception to this I feel is if there are Dom/mes that know your situation and help you grow with the other person. I dont suggest reaching out to a new Dom/me and being their friend while starting your new adventure with your possible. Communicate this with your potential though.
No one should come before your potential/current ever on either side.they should know your feelings and fears before you share them with someone else.
Dom/mes: should know and respect the collar here because it is a unity. They also should be willing to defend what is theirs if needed. In reaching outside and talking to others you may make your own feel unworthy. I was once told as we were talking about my submission "if I was as committed to you as I thought I was why did I even answer another's email." The next day this other was in his collar. Just an example of what I've gone through here.i felt so lost and unimportant to know I didnt check all the boxes for him. All because he answered another's email. I'm so thankful for it now because I found my Sir.
Now with that being said there is a human quality that is missing. Respect. If you know someone is getting to know someone a potential, and they are your friend you shouldn't be messaging them. If you are getting to know someone and a friend messages you you should let them know hey I'm getting to know this potential and let me see where were going I'm devoting my time to them. (I guess I'm saying it more in the my friend is a Dom and I am a sub kinda way) either that or get to know their potential. Have some respect.
I learn a lot from everyone here but when I started talking to my Sir I stopped responding to others. He was my sole focus because I needed to see where we matched up. This didnt happen right away because as all of you know we just started to write together. The only communication we had were the parts of our story we sent back and forth. When things started to change even building the friendship I gave him my attention. I didnt answer messages I didnt seek others out. I talked to my sub friends and tried to understand the feelings I was having but all while telling him first.
Anyway there is an overall lack of respect. On both sides of the fence. As this person said in a blog this is all very real to most of us here. D/s is based on trust and respect. So if you are looking to make a bad impression keep doing what your doing and send out you copied and pasted hellos across the board. Remember though in order to get respect you have to give it and keep earning it.
