Longer-Term D/s Considerations

boofygurl​(sub female){Taken} - Personally for me, I am not very c ok comfortable in my own skin to begin with. So, showing someone my body takes a lot if trust and reassurance that my inner beauty is what makes my outer beauty irresistible.

It is more about seducing the mind than it is the body for this little subbie I guess you could say....

The Maestro - I think in two different ways on this subject . First the easy one . We as a group or site if you will do not tell people over 25 how to be safe on a date because most know how . You get to know the person. Meet the first few times in public if you feel the need and proceed from there. Yes even in vanilla bad things happen to good people .
Now to D/s . Men are responsible for there behavior no matter there self given title . Ladies are as well and if you want to share your body , face , location or just open up
And give your mind then do so . There is only 1 right . What’s right for you .

Little moon​(sub female){Not lookin} - I think some of the general information guides and posts on here do cover some of these things and there are many ways to learn about what is not covered there by research and good old google. The basis of anything online or otherwise would be safety first and only do what you yourself are comfortable with. Whether it’s in vanilla or bdsm related the premise is the same, and while I can safely say there is lots of pressure from doms for pictures here-they can huff and puff all they want doesn’t mean they’ll get their way😂 I look at it as a good process of eliminating things I don’t want in a dim.

Bunnie - Forgive me if my answer is way off the mark, however it’s what came to mind, so I figured I’d share...

I have come to realise that many of the behaviours we see here are based around a big drive for feeding a need. I think it’s safe to say that many of us have a hungry beast inside of us that needs feeding somehow... whether that is in surrendering or being surrendered to. Power exchange.

I think the difference is that some are just more patient than others.

Some of us have learned to control the beast, because we understand the satisfaction that comes from being able to enjoy the whole process... not just the outcome.

I think this whole rushing around we see that is often associated with newbies or those unwilling to dig deeper, is merely the mindset of instant gratification.

They don’t realise that they’re missing a greater treasure... because you can’t miss what you don’t know.

So they just keep hopping from one thing to the next, jumping right to “the conclusion,” and thinking they’ve found “that thing.”

Unfortunately what they don’t understand is that “that thing” is like the peak of an orgasm... amazing at the time, however, very fleeting. That’s why those with that bit more knowledge and experience focus also on the build up... prolonged gratification.

Silly rabbits lol :b

Little moon​(sub female){Not lookin} - So true and a wonderful way of describing it yes!! They want the instant fix instead of waiting for the end result. To each their own🤗 you make me smile with your wonderful way of thinking!!

ADIDAS - Well said Ms. Bunnie. I believe you have this right down to it perfectly! The end results ARE great but getting there.... Well the ride MAKES the destination worth the trip!😉

SSG{ENM-TLP} - Sir, I really enjoyed your post. To be completely honest, I fall into the category of an early revealer (exhibition ranks high as a kink for me, so there's nothing surprising about that). To me, if there is a chance there isn't chemistry because of my body, I'd rather know right off before an emotional connection is involved. Personally, my sharing a nude photo doesn't mean anything until it is taken specifically for a person with my heart involved. Otherwise, it is just a form of identification or at the very most, porn.

Any Dom who takes advantage of a new submissive and gets off on pressuring for photos will likely just be getting a form of porn. There is NO heart attached. I had several Doms on day 1 who took advantage of a new sub. While submissive, I make choices independently. Fun is fun to me. While they may have felt they were getting "lucky" having a new sub on The Cage, they weren't any more lucky than anyone else I would have chosen to have played with by choice. Those who were truly lucky were those who invested in me and were able to enjoy parts of me that others will never experience.

What is really amazing is being a new sub and finally meeting a truly incredible Dom who is truly interested in us. Being new to lifestyle BDSM, I didn't realize the difference between those who are role playing and those who are lifestyling. Those who are here for the lifestyle have a completely different dynamic. I honestly don't think that is something you can "prepare" someone to look for except to say, "It does exist, but it could take a while to find." Each sub will be different. Some will want the role play until they are comfortable enough with the lifestyle. I think encouraging subs to be confident with themselves, encourage them to explore and have a great time, and when ready for the more serious stuff to seek out experienced subs and Doms for guidance is really the best advice. It should all be on each person's own terms.

Thank you so much for your concern for subs. I take that as a personal investment in me, Sir.

Angel Wings​(sub female) - It's scarey seeing some new subs just giving it away and hopping onto the next one.. I feel like some just spin the wheel. I just spoke to.a.new sub today that video chatted with a Dom from here the first day. It was more then chat and right aterwards she was blocked. She gave too much to fast and I explained that to her. She thought that's the way this works. She so needed to feel approval from a Dom that she didn't listen to her gut. Believe me she knows better now. I guess that's part of the education and learning subs need to know.
Great post Capn Rick.

Sunnie​(sub female) - Great post. Many have already shared what I already think on the subject. I personally am not one to share right away and I know that comes from not being comfortable with myself, I'm working on that. Also just me being modest. But If a someone is comfortable and wants to show themselves right away, and they don't mind the possible bad outcomes then who am I to say they are wrong? Now those who are taken advantage of and told you're not sub enough, acting like one or just being a brat so the new sub feels like they have to share is wrong on all levels. Trust your instincts, if something or someone doesn't feel right, it's not. Never do something you're not comfortable with.

Finished​(switch female) - I’ve also got an exhibitionist streak in me ever since I was a kid but having been raised very modestly still makes me very cautious who I expose myself to. I fully expected nude pics to be part of the deal in becoming an online sub and I am more comfortable exposing breasts more than my lower parts. In fact, even though I’ve shown my breasts to a couple of Doms since being on the Cage, only one Dom has ever seen my pussy.
The only trouble I have in exposing my whole self at once - including head shot - is that I can’t extend my arm long enough to take the selfie from far enough away. Yes, I can do mirror shots, but that limits the kind of poses and angles to take the sexier shots. I am vain enough to want to look good in each shot I send my Dom. He’s very visual, like yourself!!! ☺️😋❤️

Sunnie​(sub female) - This may sound funny and it was to me at first. Selfie stick! I hated selfie sticks don't know why just did but I thought what the heck, why not? Game changer haha I always had trouble taking good pics, my arms are short. Give it a try😉

Finished​(switch female) - Omg—- of course! Haha I never thought of it! Just goes to show I am of the older generation before Instagram and selfies! Lol 😁

ADIDAS - Ms. Jewel, I had that problem too until I learned my phone will do a neat trick☺... There's a " cheese" setting which means all I need to do is set my phone up where I need it to be so I fit in the frame as I'd like, once I am satisfied with my pose, I say out loud " LG" or " cheese" and it snaps the pic. Super cool! I have an Android phone btw and they all have this feature.

Good luck!
Ms. A.

Little moon​(sub female){Not lookin} - You can also take a few videos and freeze frame them to take shots/pictures as well, that would help you make you see yourself as well and give you another perspective of yourself, and give less stress and time constraint🤗🤔

Finished​(switch female) - Thank you! I’ll try that as well! ☺️❤️