Good day everyone,
Just a little, random blurb about what I have been up to. More superficial than most of my posts.
I usually like to post every week or so, I realize it has been a month! It has been a rough month for me. So I wanted to jump in, say hello, before I am swept up back into life. Things are good... things are GREAT. I am just pulled in so many different directions with work and school, finals and travel, solidifying large contracts and planning a potential move... even among covid (If it could go away now, that would be helpful)
I have had no inspiration to write, or even visit my inner monologue. Though I continue to analyze the world around me, my feelings and my submission, I have no time to give the patience needed to the writings I have, or the new things I am learning. I was on the road for 4 weeks, living with my parents for 2 and a half. I can say... that I have never felt like less of an human being, than when I am staying with my parents and can't even butter my own toast!... can you possibly understand now where my headspace could have been.
Wolfe and I are doing good, he is good, I am good. Though distance makes everything hard. I do not think either of us are made for the lack of touch. Missing that deep connection that we have in word, but are missing in proximity is hard on us both, of course I do not presume to speak for him, so I will leave it at that.
This funny thing happens when I travel, especially for work. I forget myself, I forget the things that are important to me: like sanity, composure. I tend to put my head down and lose myself in focus. Not that it is a bad thing, I got some life changing things done for myself, my work flourished. But as I do, I lost myself a little in the process, and with no one to tether me, I miss routines, miss communications, miss checking in. I am still learning the balance of life; of juggling two things that are the most important to me, in different ways. Throw in family that I haven't seen in 2 years, the forced extroversion I have to endure as part of the trip and a packed schedule, and you may understand when I tell you that our normal took a hit, that I did undeniably fail in certain areas, and that there were some rough moments that neither of us knew how to navigate.
I am home now, finally. Back to normal, back to my life, not to just existing in someone else's; but I still have a very busy month of April. It should all prove to be worth it on the other side. These are just moments in time, and who I am, what I have, what I am building and who I am travelling it with will rise above it, stay strong, and always be there when the moment has passed.
I miss you all, Hope you are also well.
~Oracle
