Before I start, I'm fairly certain I will be getting some heat for this blog-post.
Now- before you comment. I want you to remember: This is my humble opinion. I fully welcome other opinions, other viewpoints, even a bit of debate and discussion. However, I will not tolerate someone engaging in a debate/discussion only to try and cram their opinion down my throat. Blatant insults, or people trying to pick fights with me or others.
This is my blog. My domain. If you don't like something and cannot contribute meaningfully to my blog post- then don't say anything. Close my blog and move on.
Thank you.
Now, with BDSM. I get there's a certain thrill when a Dominant tells his sub "You're my little slut." or hearing her utter "I'm your slut." This opinion/viewpoint of mine lies OUTSIDE of the Lifestyle.
I have my own viewpoint on the term "Slut-Shaming"
From what I've gathered (And I could be very wrong.) The original term "Slut-Shaming" was more meaning towards the way a man would sleep with a bunch of women, and get high praise for it. "Jerry bagged another girl last night. Third one this week. God, what a beast!"
Whereas, if a lady did that. She's called a slut. HUGE double-standard. Major Inequality.
However, throughout recent years, the term was bastardized and misused. Or, girls take the term and try to make it into a personality trait.
I have plenty of friends that sleep with different/multiple people and don't act obnoxiously about it. (I'll give an example in a minute) If someone downed on them for sleeping around like that- then yeah. I'd fall back to the original term of "Slut-Shaming."
You can still sleep about, and be classy about it. Perhaps I'm old fashioned- but what's done behind closed doors stays behind closed doors.
Now, when I hear some woman go "Ohhh, you're Slut-Shaming me!! I just like to have secks, get over it, oh my gawd!" I'll usually just look at her and tell her "Yeah, I am slut-shaming you, because the way your acting is indecent. Don't be proud of it." ---
Before I proceed- lemme flip this on it's head for you so you'll better understand where I'm coming from in my opinion.
I know you all have met him. The guy who is way too arrogant, super pompous, kind of an asshole, narcissistic, and very selfish. Sometimes a bit too loud when he speaks. He brags and boasts about how many women he's slept with, and how he can obtain any woman he wants. After all, women are conquests and he's always up for "A challenge" ((Sometimes he'll also brag about how great his life is, or how he has the most amazing new car, gaming system, etc...))
The guy that makes you go "Ugh" with an eyeroll. "Grade A. douchebag."
The description above is the same type of person I view that lady I mentioned above as "Oh my Gawd, you're Slut-Shaming me!"
She's obnoxious. She brags about dudes she's slept with, and will willingly sleep with your boyfriend if he'll go for it. She is loud, and acts like whoring about is a personality trait and the term "slut" is a major badge of honor to carry around- when in reality. She looks disgusting, and sleazy.
But I've found today- it's 'that woman' or 'that girl' that waves that flag obnoxiously loud and prideful. She'll scream about inequality between men and women, but still be that same girl who will run to Police screaming about domestic abuse when she was the one who laid hands on her new ex-boyfriend firstly.
Coming back to the BDSM aspect of things. The above is probably why I don't like being called a "slut" or "whore" in the bedroom. (That and humiliation/degradation is not my thing.) Just doesn't get me hot. In fact, kind of turns me off. It's amusing to me how such a negative connotation can carry over into the bedroom and be such a turnoff.
((And this is a "me" problem, nobody else's.))
It just makes me raise a brow, since most of the ladies who actually do scream "slut shaming! OH! He's Slut Shaming me!" is THAT girl. It saddens me to see the term so bastardized when men have been brought up to be proud of being a "Man-whore."
These are just random morning thoughts on a Wednesday.
