How can you get someone to see that what you need and want is not Vanilla

idk, but i am taking wicked sabina's self perception of being submissive at face value. i don't get the feel that wicked sabina is "domming from the bottom," or that she would even want to? my read ...

Sat Sep 12, 2020 7:42 pm • 13 Replies • 5583 Views

Being A Sub and what it means

Thanks for the question, and all of the wonderfully thoughtful answers.

Like many of you, i don't think there is a one size fits all answer to this. Indeed, i find one of the major challenges of D/ ...

Sat Sep 12, 2020 3:29 pm • 14 Replies • 7518 Views

Which traits make a Dominant or submissive attractive?

From a Dom? Self awareness and the ability to articulate who they are and what they need/want. Balance, them wanting to know me as much as be known by me.

Thu Sep 10, 2020 3:44 pm • 33 Replies • 13171 Views

Dealing with shame

I must have been too vague, not really setting up a good scenario in my post. Here is more context...

The particular times I'm referring to what was wanted of me were not things that were beyond m ...

Wed Sep 09, 2020 3:55 pm • 29 Replies • 9790 Views

Dealing with shame

I think this is a tough one. I’m big on compatibility vs doing something because one or the other wants it. i think that leads to false expectations and resentment. I know some look at D/s differentl ...

Tue Sep 08, 2020 10:29 pm • 29 Replies • 9790 Views

Anyone else scared of horror movies?

Psychological thrillers, yeah some, if they are really good, "Get Out" is one of the more brilliantly written and performed that i have seen? i also liked "Shutter Island." "The Talented Mr RIple ...

Mon Sep 07, 2020 9:20 pm • 40 Replies • 12520 Views

Re: Does anyone care about feelings as well as the sexual as

As a switch (Primarily dom male due to never really being able to find a switch and im more dom than sub), its just hard to find someone to actually care about my feelings and be there for me. Like I ...

Mon Sep 07, 2020 8:25 pm • 26 Replies • 10596 Views

Re: Are you a true Gaslighter?

*chuckles with those that get the irony here



i left the discussion, i couldn't submit myself to that kind of stuff. i'm not that kind of sub. If i feel someone is gaslighting me directly, i ...

Thu Sep 03, 2020 8:13 pm • 30 Replies • 7256 Views

How long does it take you to fully trust a partner?

Awesome question, i think it's great fodder for discussion. Thank you for posing it.

i look at "trust" two different ways. One is trust extended in a specific instance, the other is a more built o ...

Wed Sep 02, 2020 10:17 pm • 44 Replies • 15009 Views

Re: Are you a true masochist?

Well are you? Who else can relate to me?

I mean I am still submissive in nature to the right man but I really only desire to be given pain. That is where I will be submissive, to get my pain.

I ...

Wed Sep 02, 2020 7:27 pm • 115 Replies • 25996 Views