HuntertheYeenQueen(dom femme){Allie Kat}
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6 years ago •
Dec 15, 2018
6 years ago •
Dec 15, 2018
Cheating is absolutely abuse. Not physical, but emotional. And Wolfy was not arguing, but simply trying to discuss. He had not derailed anything.
The problem with cheating, which is what is being done here in trying to find someone other than his wife without her permission to care for his needs, is, as Wolfy has said, it is not victimless.
It doesn't matter if the other partner was a piece of crap, didnt listen, was mean beforehand, any excuse I can be given. There is no reason to cheat.
Cheating does nothing but destroy lives.
I'm currently trying to help keep my best friend's mental sanity together because her fiancee cheated on her. Just once, but he ended up tearing himself apart about it and then was so unwilling to listen to her when she said she forgave him that they are now separated and she is blaming herself for EVERYTHING when she did NOTHING wrong. All she did was love him. And out of selfishness he /planned/ to meet up and sleep with someone, for practically no reason as he admitted later on. And on top of it instead of coming to her to tell her about it, try to fix it, he tried to hide it. She had to find out through other means. He was going to marry her with this lie.
My family was destroyed when I was 9 years old because instead of talking to my father who had nothing but love in his heart for my mother and trying to work on their problems, she decided to cheat and then start an affair on my father. It destroyed him and gave him such trouble with trusting that the poor man is still alone even after trying to date a few times but being unable to properly believe that he wouldn't be hurt again. She mentally fucked me over by including me in her lies (which in turn tried to take me away from my father, despite nothing she said being true) to try and cover up her infidelity. She was so desperate to prove she was innocent that she dragged her child into it. Faked mental illness and gave me nightmares over these made-up episodes she performed to try and plead that she wasn't all there when everything came out. Because of how deep her lies went, when I started dating Wolfy, I was constantly mistrusting of him, especially because we started off as long-distance and interactions were purely through Skype and texting, and /I/ had not ever been cheated on - I simply was another victim of the lies and abuse and had my own trust issues develop from it from the age of 9. I constantly worried he would do things like the original post here explains, especially as this was my first relationship so I had no experience. Luckily my husband is incredibly sweet and supportive and has helped me grow and mature and understand how love actually works. Because of him I dont have to fear infidelity. But that doesn't mean its okay.
What the OP is saying he is doing in his post, is cheating. What we are trying to tell him is that it is NOT worth it, because of our experiences, and because of logic. And these arent my only experiences with cheating, either. Just the ones that ended up having a serious effect on me and therefore are the best examples to help show that we're not just making stuff up.
Cheating doesn't help. It only creates pain.
Talking is the solution for him and if his wife refuses to compromise then they need to decide if their current life is truly right for them. Finding someone outside of his marriage without her concent will not do anyone any good. Online cheating is still cheating. There is no difference in the severity of the situation.
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