Verbal Humiliation

Thank you all for your input.

Yes it is a fetish; those who do not find the words and phrases to be an actual turn on qd those into it do, will be upset, angry, probably furious , and signalling the start of the end of that relationship were one to isr those words and phrases as a part of their sexual activities.

In an intimate setting, yes!
In a public setting, in front of other people, then no.
Small penis humilation, verbal degredation, in an intimate setting (either just me with Her, or with HEr and Her lover) are hot! But in public, in front of others who are not "hip to what is going on" then it just would look bad.

Verbal humiliation is a small phrase that covers a big area. Like discipline, or bondage, or SM it covers many aspects that all ride a continuum from mild to wild.

If you wish to engage in this activity be very clear about what and why. Don't be vague.

For me, verbal humiliation is a hard limit. Primarily the disrespectful stuff. Name-calling, mocking, belittling, etc. All huge no-no's for me. So I am clear when it comes up with potential partners. Crawling or begging to come, are still seen as humiliation but very different for me.

Also, two big considerations are level of experience and emotional maturity. Avoid angry people and misogynists who are drawn to this life by the idea of hurting others.

It would be easy to jump to someone into it when it has been hard for you to find, but you can open yourself up to damaging after-effects that way.

So please be sure of what you seek and why you seek it before engaging.

I would also add that before you get into verbal humiliation, that you take the time to see how this person is in milder situations. If they slip and push too hard now and then when respecting your boundaries in other areas. Then you can't trust them to respect your boundaries in this.

H*

Ohhhhh, I can get down with this.

I degrade people when they're cowards or make assumptions. Does anyone really want to be that fragile person? There's "asking" ways of going about it.

I also remember a time I was being talked down too. I simply asked "Who does that remind you of?" And things got worked out ASAP.

It's funny how change comes quickly once you get people to look into a mirror. I find it amusing even. And if you really push my buttons and claim to know you know it all, I can and will get you to contradict yourself. You will feel like an idiot when you do that. It is hypocrisy.

The honest hypocrites? Those are the ones I can trust. If you don't manipulate a liar to trip themselves up then you let them remain a liar (they won't be aware they're lying to themselves. But ignorance won't save you). And they will keep lying to themselves and those around them. So, yes, I manipulate people. But I also state why I do and give reason for it without lies or secrets. It's intended, meant and therefor controlled. And also made aware and known, keeping it honest. Provided someone has a brain and can isn't just trying to avoid the situaiton, which I stress does not make it go away. If you can't face and confront then I'm the least of your problems.

You can also try to get under my skin. At this point I don't think anything can phase me anymore. Where others complain and lash out I sit back and leave them to their assumptions. Once they finally ASK me I can then correct them. Which calms them down.

In the end you can only work yourself up. And if you play me a fool I'm going to let you. Learn to ask and you won't feel like such an idiot. It's not rocket science.

I think it's really important to have conversations about what topics are on/ off the table before you engage, though. Everyone has no-go areas. And it's as important to have safe words for this kind of play as it is for impact play etc.

Concerns must be addressed. Otherwise they will linger and catch up. The longer a situation drags out the more harm/damage it can cause to both people involved (or more if that's a factor). This is important to keep in mind with both serious events and when playing together. In fact, people that do interrogation (the real kind) will even state that. That it's in the interest of the patients safety and sanity to get fast results. Just because someone tries to shut a topic down doesn't mean it's the safest course of action.

Wherever you leave someone with their ignorance and assumptions, that can go a varied number of ways depending on the situation. But if you at least stress that THEY'RE deciding what they're doing then it's on their head if nothing else. Buuuut... If you leave ignorance and assumptions unattended then do they make a clear and well informed choice? I'd have to say no.

Actions betray words when people are challenged. If someone tells me "No go" I state "What's the context with me?" At that point it's kind of impossible to say you have a clear and concious choice on the matter. Because it's blind. If you're blind to me then I need to know your context to make a decision one way or the other.

Any time I phrase things in that way people want to know. On the spot. Because if they don't know then where's the (well informed and clear) choice?

Technical details can come after. But it all starts with "What do you say no too when you're don't even know?" It's quite the interesting situation. Because if they know they don't know, suddenly they want to know. They want to think and use their brain even if they showed every indication they didn't want too beforehand.

There's probably some sort of defintion for that. If there is I can't think of it. I think it's peoples desire for answers that compels them to find out in the interest of honesty and choice. That's my theory anyway. Let me know what you think of the matter.

" Suck that cock, you slut!"
Yes Daddy!
"You love sucking my big cock don't you, you slimy little faggot."
Yes Daddy!
"Lick my butthole clean you filthy piece of shit, you fucking waste of carbon!"
Yes Daddy!
"And don't you ever try to slip that huge ugly nose of yours up my ass again when you're doing it!"
Yes...my... my whaaat?

Yes, folks, there are limits for most people, but for the rest of us it only turns us on further. Thank God I don't have a small dick, though, that is one thing I would never make fun of. It would crush me if it happened to me because I spend so much time pretending a guy doesn't have a small dick, he starts believing that he doesn't have a small dick around me. To suddenly shine a spotlight on his age-old problem that he feels comfortable being around me with is "Who's Afraid of Virginia Woolf" level cruel. I'm a Master, maybe even a sadist, but I could never hurt somebody in that particular way, ever. Our bodies are our bodies, we have no control over how beautiful or ugly we look, if our dicks are pinky-pricks or if we have tiny boobs with lint catching, inverted nipples. Condemn the man for who he is, not what he is, for God's sakes.

I hope your anger has lessened somewhat since you initially made this comment.

Yes it definitely is a fetish. It has been my experience that it actually happens a lot.
Humiliation, degradation, whatever, as has been said many times if it works for you then it is what it is for you.
And as it is with everything it is a matter or negotiations, limits, and the nature of your dynamic overall.