The Culture that has been here all the time

History reveals that challenges to peace and tranquility are constantly nipping at humanity's heels; somehow, nevertheless, we seem to eek out improvements in the World, sometimes with significant human cost. Recent developments in the World seem to indicate that steps backward are being taken, and we are being tested again. I lived through the 1960s, and now I see improvements made back then slipping away. I voiced my opinion numerous times on Social Media Platforms, but I feel like a mouse screaming out a warning in a vast wilderness of ears that will not hear. I have no political power or a significant voice bestowed on me by notoriety or celebrity, so there isn't much I can do to have a positive impact.

If I can stir you, my blog readers know this as King Solomon wrote centuries ago, "There is nothing new under the sun." 

Plato and Aristotle on the Family and the Polis
John Hittinger
The University of St. Thomas, Houston
The question of the family is at the heart of many important political issues

EMPATHY LOST IS MORE THAN PARADISE LOST. What value is it to explore the Moon or Colonize Mars without empathy?  Are we presently here to serve and please the few and ignore the many?

If we are losing empathy, it must be that it is being eroded within the family unit. Perhaps we are at a point where humans no longer need the family unit, and dysfunction will replace well-balanced caring humans with cold calculating entities. Note, I am not saying this because we are threatened by AI (Artificial Intelligence). I am warning humanity, it seems we will find a way to self-destruct, and it may not be in some Science Fiction Novel set in the distant future.

Intimate Grooming is not just for appearances, it fulfills an important purpose. When considering a new lover who is a stranger to you, a subtle inspection of their pubic area can reveal if they have a health problem or an infestation of pubic lice. If you are a bold type, you can instruct them to undress and have a look. Admittedly, this can break a romantic spell, so think carefully before you plunge into this without considering the potential for a negative effect. 

From an aesthetic point of view, you may like your new lover to be as smooth and clean as a Greek or Roman statue. I admit intimate grooming as a practice together can be arousing too. People who can't make up their mind on the preference can experience a delay in intimacy if they had their lover remove all their body hair, then change their mind and decide they are more excited by seeing body hair.

Now you will have to wait for it all to grow back if you insist.

(Photos Public Domain)

Throughout my life, I must confess I have encountered many incarnations of the nine Muses of Greek and Roman Mythology. To be more accurate, their apparent mortal incarnations. They influenced my artwork, my songs, and my inherent ideology.

In the beginning, I was only aware of them in a vague sense derived from imagery portrayed in Pop Culture. I discovered the Nine Muses influence and inspire much more than music, song, and paintings. This was the result that I am a fallible mortal man. Thus, the view of a muse for me always had a sexual tension, always associated with a beautiful woman in my view. In recent years of reflection and contemplation, I have amended my vision of a Muse. The Muse I envision need not have a permanent sexual component. Still, the connection should be warm and loving.

The idealized Muse of my youth, with idealized physical beauty and perfect empathy, has been replaced with a more realistic person with greater internal beauty, having greater importance. She understands me in great detail, the positives and the negatives, and encourages me to be at my creative best.

My wife, whom I see fading away more each day, was exactly this Muse.

I hope this day doesn't morph into a Hard Day's Night. My wife was very manageable today, but I? I was (still) am a clumbsy bafoon. Drop things, forget things, I forgot to do things (clothes sat in the washer for hours), spilled coffee, dropped food, maybe I am at the beginning of dementia. Who will care for my wife if so?

My dogs got under my feet several times, but fortunately, Sunny Day, my cat, cuddled up to me. No, he can not replace the love my wife offered years ago, but I suppose he is doing his best. And at least I have him to keep me warm.

On a good day, my wife still walks around, eats, and drinks. On a bad day, she tends to fall. If I constantly watch her, she keeps walking, she keeps eating, and remains hydrated, we then have good days. I want as many of those as I can help achieve. Even on good days, I must change her, keep her clean, and ensure she is well. She no longer has the use of or understands language, but might watch a colorful TV screen for a few moments. Apphasia prevents me from communicating with her, so I do not know if she knows who I am or even has a lucid few minutes.

I love her, but wonder if I am in love with the old her, and just imagine that she is the same inside. She will laugh a little if I offer something she finds amusing. She will rebel if she refuses to do something like eat or go to bed. In the worst case, she will hit or bite me. I have trained myself to ignore this, and when she dumps her food onto the floor, there probably isn't a reason for it.

She likes stuffed animals and dolls.

Dear Future Lover,

I look forward to spending time with you doing ordinary things like a walk in the garden or on the beach; a ride in the farmland or the mountains; shopping together and cooking. Learning all about you and sharing all about me with you. Learning how to surprise you with a gesture or a gift.

The most important thing that I look forward to is how we will learn how to love each other in every way.

I will be open to your needs, and I know you will be open to my needs.

The past for you and me will only serve as lessons to avoid mistakes and lessons to do better.

It will be my goal to treasure and cherish you along with loving you with my whole heart.

Sincerly

Your Future Lover

GOOGLE AI: Humans have a fundamental need for touch, crucial for both physical and emotional well-being, fostering healthy relationships, reducing stress, and promoting a sense of connection and belonging. 

Humans naturally crave intimacy, which is crucial for well-being and involves feeling valued, connected, and understood, both physically and emotionally. 

I can hug and kiss my wife (not to be crass), but I can do the same with my cat and dogs. Long ago, I learned how needy I was when deprived of this when my second wife abandoned my son and me (she, an RN, thought he was going to die young with his heart defect).

My wife, with Dementia Alzheimer's and Aphasia, is leaving me once more on the shore of an unexplored island without the intimacy I need so very badly. Of course, I will take care of her despite this and not abandon her.

Intimacy can not be purchased in Walmart or on Amazon. I tried to do so online and was severely scammed (my stupidity, of course).

I am so glad I can express myself here on The Cage without former friends and family criticizing or condemning me.

It seems most BDSM People honestly explain themselves. If you are seeking a Unicorn, a Little, a Sex Slave, or a plain Vanilla Sub, these attributes and many more are displayed up front. Nudity assists in identifying attraction preferences, such as breast size, and the male and female genitalia variations are offered, like just about nowhere else.

I have learned that certain vagina or vulva are more appealing to me. Smaller breasts likewise. I have a penus about six inches but its circumference is above the average. I am circumcised.

In society, it is typical to find a mate fall in love and adapt to what you both get sexually, but BDSM changes not only that, but we can reflect on body type preferences, and many love-making tendencies as well

Here within the BDSM society, I can define my likes and dislikes and tell a potential lover what my limits are and in what way I like to experiment. In general, one excellent lover I had before my current marriage explained to me how I was "kinky". In my nature but ignorant of this trait.

I was married three times, and by chance, my current wife of forty years and I were an excellent sexual pair until dementia destroyed us as lovers. The first two not so much. Youthful sexual exploits were all about my being satisfied, now I strive to please my lover more.

Thank you, BDSM community and especially this site for being so educational. I only regret not realizing all these benefits as a young man.

pixabay.com

Yes, I have written in the past things about my wife and about my being kinky, all that reflects my experience and knowledge previous to understanding and knowing about BDSM, and specifically Dominant and submissive.

Hindsight is 20/20 for sure.

Without a doubt, my wife was a classic submissive woman. That doesn't mean she didn't teach me how to be her lover, or rather her kinky lover. She had. Dom sub or switch, we had great sex for two major reasons: 1. I was willing to learn, and 2. she was willing to teach.

Yes, another subtle if not explicit complaint we are no longer lovers because of her ADA, I carefully tested the situation and confirmed that this is our reality, much to my disappointment.

With my libido intact and my doctors telling me a healthy life includes regular sex and that it is a factor in longevity, especially for men is of great concern for me.

I am in no hurry to become a vegetable that is not my goal.

PEOPLE ASK

Do sexually active men live longer?
 
Furthermore, their research showed that men in good or excellent health participated in regular sexual activity lived an extra five to seven years, and women in substantially good health lived three to six years longer.

I think I know why. Without quality sex in a loving relationship, there is no point in living, is there?

Yes, dementia destroys the person with it, but it also destroys everyone around them, usually as well. I write often about having my wife severely affected by Alzheimer's Dementia and Aphasia (early onset like Bruce Willis). I even wrote about moving from NJ to PA because family members told me they would help care for her, but they abandoned helping me in less than two months.

I attempted to explain this: I honor my commitment to care for my wife, and my caring alone began in 2017. Some of you empathize with me, not having a complete wife-husband relationship, some of you seem to believe that that is my problem to deal with (and it is). Not having friends to socialize with in this quaint, nice town with many positive attributes is like living on Mars with my wife, and we only take our spaceship out to go to healthcare. Groceries and supplies are brought to us with the supply ship from Earth about once a week. I experienced something last night disturbing; actually, two things.

1. I had a very difficult time getting her upstairs to wash and change her and into bed. And.

2. I enjoy many British television programs before I go to bed, and the one I have been watching lately is especially good: Bloodlands. Excellent story, mystery, suspense, and acting.

WHEN MY WIFE WAS NORMAL, WE WOULD TALK ABOUT THINGS LIKE THIS TV SHOW, BUT SHE IS OBLIVIOUS TO THEM NOW, AND I FEEL MORE ALONE THAN EVER. So yes, no intimacy is not good, but something as simple as discussing a TV show somehow seems even worse.

Link to the show: