The Culture that has been here all the time

Hello friend,

Sweet Ginger in her blog quotes Bob Marley's comment about what he thought a perfect woman would be like his answer was impeccable. May I add this it is their imperfections that make a woman special. It adds to her uniqueness and builds endearment within me.

What a miserable world it would be if you looked at a crowd where a woman you knew was supposed to be and all the women nearly looked the same.

Every woman I loved would not stand up to the stereotypical image media would have you believe what perfection was. Each had something different to love about them. What do I know I am just a fool who falls in love with only a woman's mind revealed to me in texts only to find out she was just playing with me. Love doesn't die that easy, does it?

Hello friends,

You noticed I referred to Hippies when they seemed to emerge back in the 1960s well Being a hippie is a culture, a belief system, and a code of behavior. I recall seeing the tail end of "The Beat Generation" another counter-culture (For the subculture surrounding the literary movement, see Beatnik. For the more, see Beat Generation (play).) And for even more information, a good place to go is: I I googled this term for the 1960s and this is what came up: 

"In the 1960's, there were many counterculture movements. This included civil rights, feminism, protesting the Vietnam war, segregation, sexual revolution and many more. It is argued that those came from the left of the political spectrum. To me, it was more of an intergenerational change."

I was in contact with all these aspects through the people I knew and associated with in the music/art scene in New York City's Greenwich Village. The main subculture that philosophically touched me the most and though I couldn't immerse myself into it entirely was The Hippies. The term? "I am Hip" means you understand something. " Hey, Joe is that a gun it is dangerous.", "I'm hip man."  

            From: People also ask: How did the term hippie originate?

"The movement originated on college campuses in the United States, although it spread to other countries, including Canada and Britain. The name derived from “hip,” a term applied to the Beats of the 1950s, such as Allen Ginsberg and Jack Kerouac, who were generally considered to be the precursors of hippies."

 Do hippies exist today? Yes. For an up-to-date assessment go to this article: and discover what the current status of hippies is.

This link really comes close to my experiences and who I crossed paths with: 

Hello Friends,

Ok, you want the job. They read your resume and are interested in you. Come to work tomorrow? NO "WE have to interview you."

A prospective mate is recruited like that: arranged marriages or "Mail Order Brides".  The vast majority of us when we date gather information and logically assess our prospective mates not really. We rely on superficial things maybe our "gut " feeling. That isn't the best approach but an interview is still important romantic or not.

I have looked for a prospective date (even though currently I can not date) and when I read that she wants, to cuddle watch a movie, take a walk go out to eat once a month; that is ok. But if she wants to travel, do expensive sports, hop around clubs, and party; I can not do it.

Dom Sub: Sub Dom Protocol. Have a protocol that delineates what you will and will not do. Agree or disagree in great detail. If you want some leeway spell it out so each has a clear picture. Don't leave it to chance.

Hello, my friends,

I wasn't planning to write today being it is Valentine's Day and my wife is unable to understand that but, then I realized I am not the only one in a situation like this: Others may not have a "Valintine" or a reason to celebrate Valentine's Day as well. 

My wife is seriously ill maybe another one of you share this situation. Maybe you were, maybe left alone or they shattered your heart? 

Why do we suffer from a broken heart? We give more to the other person than they are willing to give you. My wife was so rare a woman and a perfect Sub I did well by her but if I understood her better I would have done better for her. But, now I demonstrate my love sacrificially and somehow I think she knows. Still, I miss having her as a complete mate: Partner, affectionate comforter, and (most missed) my lover.

Some hope for the future though it is complicated by my actions when I was ill-prepared to truly understand the consequences of my actions. I am happy that I led myself into boxed canyons by thinking I was trusting a real potential companion only to be ambushed with disappointing results.

I fell taking my dogs out back and hurt my face bled everywhere as I went back into the house for ice (still gave the dogs their rewards). The pain to me was nothing compared to a betrayal by a love interest: It is like a literal knife in my chest.

I still have hope for that companion. I still have room in my heart to love someone (I never stop even when they hurt me). Nothing is going to stop me from caring for my wife. I know somewhere there is a lover who will love me like that and care for me like I care for my wife.

So it appears there is something to hope for this Valentine's Day.

Hello Friends,

With my wife in serious cognitive decline and not recognizing any holidays Valentine's Day is just another day. I no longer mess around with scammers to pretend to celebrate a Holiday of any kind.

I do have the memories that my wife and I shared for about 36 of the 39 years we have been together. And this is a good thing to have and to hold.

In the meantime for any of you who observe Valentine's Day, I wish you a good one. Warm and filled with love and affection.

Sincerely Andron

Hello all,

I made a friend who is considered an outcast in many cultures: "The gender nonconforming or third-gender, ceremonial roles traditionally embodied by some Native American and Indigenous peoples in Canada . . . ." Twin Spirits¹  Theopenness in me and acceptance of people who are different has its roots in my experience with the Counter Culture in the 1960s Related to the attitudes of Hippies² We embraced many people who were sincerely different not just there to capitalize on the business of the drug culture, acid rock, civil disobedience, antiwar, civil rights . . .

We had shops that we patronized of course. I collected teas from around the world. Dressed in Mod when it emerged and grew my hair and was beat up because I was so different.  But I demonstrated I could play football, and baseball, and be part of our High School Band too. But when a talent show came up I chose to sing songs by Bob Dylan and my gym teacher slammed me against a locker, "No one is going to like you freak," is what he said. Guess what? I received more than one standing ovation for Bob Dylan's, "Masters of War", "It's a Hard Rain that's Gonna Fall," and at least one of my original songs (My Love's Face).

So, so much has changed and yet so much has not.

¹

2

Yes, Friends,

My wife has Alzheimer's/Dementia/Aphasia but she shocked me a couple of days ago: She was crying in the kitchen doorway I went up to hug her and it seemed she remembered that we were married and said, "I love you." The fleeting moment did not last but it stirred within me a new sense of loss.

Sadness overwhelmed me because it is so rare for her to remember anything of our past.

Doctors tell me, "She will not recover."

And, so I continue to live with this worst-case scenario for more than 3 years now.

Hello Friends,

"Blood, Sweat and Tears" not the "Jazz Rock Group the idiom: Two years in Pennsylvania and a Year and a half in my 93-year-old home in the quaint Boyertown with mountains and farms close by (and a lot of nature) just what I need. Caregiving keeps me from taking mental health relaxing rides into the countryside. Whenever I bought a new house (new or old) I had to put BST into the transition. No difference here except my role as a caregiver takes priority so I am relegated to more of a hantyman. 

The house needs maintenance of course and some modifications to accommodate my wife with Alzheimer's. We share one common trait we are tough and refuse to yield to adversity. So my role as a housekeeper, pet minder, bookkeeper bill payer, and caregiver for my wife does require literally Blood Sweat, and Tears.

Yet, I can squeeze a little time to write songs and a blog, and, sometimes watch my favorite British television programs.

Yes I get frustrated, worn out, and flirt with anger, but my center of gravity is LOVE.

Hello Friends,

We all belong to a human entity of some form. In some cave in the distant past a family of humans had ways to identify friend or foe and that is the essence of having an identity within a group.

It was the 1960s and as a teenager, I was enthralled by the notion of "non-conformity". It was a myth. When I ran away to Greenwich Village and lived among all the free spirits, artists, music people, and "non-conformists", I quickly realized if I was to belong to a part of one of these subcultures I would need to conform to the implicit rules, language, dress, and attitude. Wow, what an eye-opener.

So this was my progression: Folk Singer-Songwriter inspired by the contemporaries BobDylan, Pete Seeger . . . et al. Folk Rock Band Leader. Activists: Civil Rights Anti War. Then! I was instructed to sing a certain song and burn my draft card. I decided not to because one of my surrogate fathers was a Siver Star Winner in WWII. All the well-known celebrities I knew said, "Go back to school". I did, the Vietnam Conflict was still raging a friend from High School was killed in action. I had more mind power than Braun so I enlisted to the amazement of all my friends and it all worked out well. I was a model soldier, served four years and here I am.

I then in 1972 I conformed to regular society married twice worked a good job(s) was educated and when things went bad was led to the Lord by my wife (whom I take care of). Conformed to the religious right until they failed to help my wife who had been a diligent Christian for more than forty years.

Full circle. I am closer to being a nonconformist than I was in the 1960s. 

 Hello Friends,

Many of you who know me or follow my blog know that my wife of 39 years in a monogamous relationship is stricken with Alzheimer's/Dementia/Aphasia and I have been her only caregiver. I moved to PA then Boyertown because family encouraged me telling me they would help us. That did not happen so I have been a stranger in a strange land without more than a token amount of social contact.

During the last year, I searched for a companion woman to be a friend with benefits to help me get through the challenges I face. All I got was many false hopes and scammed for several thousands of dollars. However, I serendipitously became involved with BDSM in particular M/S and this has opened my mind to possibilities I would not have considered in the past: 1) Because I will continue to care for my wife and not divorce her I now declared we have an open relationship and 2) I now want to have polyamorous relationships for 2 reasons: A) I want a lover or lovers to not be tied to me and my situation and B) Under my current life constraints I am not free to seek a woman who would best be a compatible match; Not in the usual way I had before dating.

What will I do? What do I expect? I have only a vague notion at this time. The biggest hindrance is dating sites with so much ambiguity and pretenses. The next concern? How to detect a scammer before they pluck my heartstrings and surprise me with their trap?

I am off into the unknown.  MY BEST BUDDIE SONNY